The one where Tim Allen almost goes to space

Yesterday's chairs made me nostalgic... They were the same we had in the film department in college.

Today's chairs are just downright comfy. A+ for you, Carnegie Mellon!

I am always in a better mood when I start out my day getting ready to 90s tv on TBS.

Shopping spree

I totally made a new study abroad lady friend today. It is times like this that I realize how lonely and kinda sad it is to travel alone. Maybe someday I will graduate to eating my mediocre chain restaurant dinners with another traveler person and not just with my cellphone.

Looks like I'm going to make it out of here without eating at Chick-Fil-A. Mistake or not?

new slogan for Ohio: "Bigger than it looks on the map!"

Lotto update: I did win $2 in Mass while waiting for the bus on Tuesday. Ohio was a no-go...BUT I almost won a chance to enter a drawing to be on a game show. So... that's weird. And almost cool.  Total so far is now.... $59!

"Welcome to Pennsylvania! That will be.... $4.30." Toll roads are annoying. But Pittsburgh! I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't this. I am already enamored! Plus this is one of the nicest hotels I've ever stayed in. Shout out to Priceline.

I always joke about being lazy. But traveling has recently made me realize that my laziness is more complex and selective than I had thought before. For example: this morning, after realizing that it was going to be colder than I expected, and having a ready-to-go dress but badly wrinkled pants, I made the decision to go to Target to get tights instead of ironing my pants. Granted, I needed contact solution too.... but let's be honest. I really didn't want to iron those pants. 

also.... I like cornfields, but MAN. Radio just keeps getting more and more terrible out here. New favorite/most applicable country song: "Baggage Claim." (google those lyrics, trust me - it's worth it.) Probably another instance of selective laziness.... obviously I'd rather spend hours scanning through terrible music than take 2 minutes to plug in my iPod and be able to listen to things I like.

I also may have inadvertently helped a student tabling next to me today decide on her future life path. What can I say, obviously I'm an inspirational person.

PS.... coffee on my dress = have to iron the pants anyway. Comeuppance.

Snacks

There is a small freezer in the lobby of my hotel/motel with Hot Pockets, corn dogs, and "chocolate popsicles" for "anytime snacking."

Just, you know, in case a corn dog sounds like a more appetizing breakfast than yogurt or egg-bagel-toppers.

Did you know they sell Edward wigs?

Girls behind me arguing whether vampires sparkle or explode when exposed to sunlight.

Now back to trying to recruit every student I see with muttonchops. Yes, there's more than one.

LOTTERY SUCCESS

I should of known my first win would occur in a Sheetz. I bought one ticket and lost but had a feeling that a win was around the corner...so like a addict I hungrily fed the machine another dollar. Luckily I was right and I won my dollar back! Not the 500 I was hoping for but better than another loss...or spending all of the cash in my wallet.

Virginia, we're even.

cowhaus

On a lunch hunt today, ended up at a recently opened ice cream shop (only because they had wireless, of course.)

No one else inside, except the owner, who was scooping. She was so excited to see me that she talked me into tasting almost every flavor (if you know me at all, you know I was difficult to convince). Test drove peach amaretto, "the dude" (guinness), caramel salt, early grey, apple cider, "Mad Mex" (mix of several different vanillas with cinammon), and something that was full of chocolate. All made from local dairy with local seasonal ingredients.

Settled on Earl Grey. By the end of this adventure, I realized that this was seriously some of THE BEST ICE CREAM I'VE EVER HAD. Ever. This includes Amy's, this includes Toscanini's, this includes everything on Cape.

Who knew I would find heaven in the middle of Ohio? 

Next project: keep a detailed record of my ice cream encounters. This kind of information can't be kept to myself.

Cultural observations

in virginia, the olive garden is packed on weds night. like hour long wait packed. weird...

also, people here drink a lot of mellow yellow. so much that it is in every vending maching and every soda fountain.

definately not in kansas anymore...

Travel chic

Pretty soon all of my airplane clothes are going to be SOOO stylish! Just look at what is coming into fashion: http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/starbucks-alexander-wang-unisex-tee/3228567?origin=keywordsearch&resultback=141

This is great, I've been ahead of this trend since I was 3.

half the suitcase, twice the fun!

Actual commercial seen on tv:

Printable.

Barbie.

Hair.

Extensions.

UM.

In other news, the guy who gave me my rental car might be the SINGLE LARGEST PERSON I have ever seen. Literally. I think he was twice my size. I had to look straight up to talk to him. 7 feet? 12 feet? I don't know. TALL. I probably would've paid money to see him try and drive my tiny Aveo.

Also, for all you concerned citizens out there: Don't worry. Made it to my hotel just in time for Glee tonight. CLOSE CALL. (yeah, yeah. judge me all you want.)

home is where you don't actually have any food, because you're always traveling.

Favorite story I somehow neglected to mention.

Sitting on the plane, people still boarding. Girl behind me on her cell phone with her mother, having a FULL ON MELTDOWN. Crying, freaking out. About what you ask? Oh you know, the usual. Feeling like her job doesn't give her enough freedom, thinking about moving to a new city, 17th century romanticism.....

wait, what?

oh yes. I'm not sure of the exact details, but this young lady (probably about my own age) is apparently having a complete mental breakdown on an airplane out because her line of work has something to do with 17th century romanticism, and she thinks there's a lot more opportunity in studying 18th century literature, but she's "just not an 18th century girl."

I guess that might make me cry too. Especially since... well, I mean, wasn't Romanticism kind of... only an 18th/early 19th century thing? I've been out of college a few years but ... I don't think I ever actually came across the phrase "17th century romantics." I think this girl's problems might be more serious than she realizes.

Octoberfest

So here I am in Fredericksburg waiting for my late train to get back to DC. Of course, it is pouring rain so I don't want to explore outside (not the mention the 20 lbs of fair equipment I have slung over my shoulder) so I find myself having an early bird special at the restaurant across from the train station. This place is called the Bavarian Chef. A boy in Leiderhosen just brought me a salad. They are also playing upbeat music that closely resembles the polka.

The next challenge will be getting them to let me sit here for 3 hours until my train arrives.

I think it is time to buy my Virginia lottery ticket.

I'm moving to Illinois.

Land of Lincoln? More like Land of ENDLESS CASH.

Thought I was in Wisconsin, but had accidentally crossed into Illinois. Bought a ticket, won a free ticket. Got my free ticket, WON $10. This brings my state total to $56!

Also won $1 when I made it back to Wisconsin.

Texas let me down.

Conclusion: there is a 100% chance of winning the Illinois lottery, and everywhere else is worthless. Except Wisconsin, which IS kind of awesome.

INCLUDING 600 BLACK ANGELS DONATED BY OPRAH WINFREY.

Beloit has an ANGEL MUSEUM. Housing THE WORLD'S LARGEST COLLECTION OF ANGELS.

Over 11,000 of them. In one place.

This is "Joyce Berg, the Angel Lady."

WHY did I not plan ahead? I have learned my lesson. Next time, I am setting aside an hour for this. Or, you know, a whole week.

I love America.

Good starts

Yesterday morning, poured about half a gallon of milk all over the counter/floor/myself in the hotel breakfast room. Thankfully, wool skirts resist milk messes well.

Horrible flashback to causing a massive breakfast disturbance at a youth hostel last summer when I knocked over an entire bar of breakfast supplies.

Maybe I should just focus on lunch when I'm traveling from now on.

Good Ideas

Public transit. I'm writing this while in transit from Baltimore to Washington, DC. No GPS, no traffic, no parking headache. Just some waiting around and online shopping. Can all cities be this easy?

Lone Star State of Mind

A whirlwind Tour of Texas reminded me of all the benefits of southern living. Namely....

-Genuinely friendly strangers! And the perk of being able to act in a friendly manner to others without causing suspicion or confusion. (Case in point: the two middle-aged dads and 3 delightful crowd-surfing hipsters I befriended over the course of the weekend. All it takes is a little sunscreen to share and a willingness to mock CeeLo!)
-Big skies! Bigger sunsets! INSANE LIGHTNING SHOWS.
-Accents!
-The food. obviously.
-75 mph speed limits!

In other news, it's time for..... STEVIE WONDER FACTS!!!! 


Based on my research this weekend, I can verify the following:


Stevie Wonder loves to rock.
Stevie Wonder loves to call just to say he loves you.
Stevie Wonder loves peace and equality.
Stevie Wonder loves gun control.
Stevie Wonder loves you and I because we are all part of the same human family.
Stevie Wonder loves love.

Why yes, I do work for a non-profit.

Third week on the road without going to a hotel. This has to be some sort of record. Or at least something for homeless people to look up to.

In other news, I love Boulder and Boulder loves me. I'm not sure if I'm going to leave. The only thing missing from this heavenly wonderland is a ocean. But maybe I could just get a salt water pool.

Sept 19

Today is International Talk Like a Pirate Day.

This has to work in our favor.

oh PS.

I just stepped on a dead scorpion.

HOME SWEET HOME!!!

so tired I don't really care.

hm.

Categories.

Tonight I drove from Houston to Georgetown.

PLACES I WANTED TO STOP:
-Michael's taxidermy.
-Happy Donut.
-"Jesus Saves" Tent Sale.
-Any of the more than 3 each I saw of the following: Drive-Thru beverage barns, sausage stores/warehouses, excessively large cement yard-art sales.
-Every town with a population of 300 or less.

PLACES I ACTUALLY STOPPED:
-Sonic (TOT STOP!)
-Brenham, TX (home of  Blue Bell Ice Cream. Accidental detour that turned into me following signs to an ice cream tour, only to cry on the inside when it was closed. I will not be having a Blue Bell Country Day.)

PLACES I ACTUALLY STOPPED, THAT IT TURNS OUT MY FATHER ALSO STOPPED. ALSO ON HIS WAY FROM HOUSTON TO GEORGETOWN. ALSO FOR WORK. ALSO IN A RENTAL CAR. 
-Buc-ees Truck Stop. (Billboard: "OMG... LOL.... it's a beaver!)  .... (not a joke)

TIME MY FATHER AND I BOTH ARRIVED HOME: 
9:25pm.

THINGS MY FAMILY IS APPARENTLY TERRIBLE AT:
Carpooling.

THINGS THAT APPARENTLY DON'T WORK ON THE SECOND FLOOR OF OUR HOUSE FOR REASONS I DON'T UNDERSTAND:
The water.

Good night.

More questions

Today I attended a fair that was held outside. Normally this would be nice, but not today. One, it was pouring and cold. And second, it smelled like elephants outside. I just want to know who thought it would increase traffic if we were all outside in a zoo-tent environment.

Luckily the girl at Starbucks made a mistake and I got my chai for free. I took that as a sign that I had collected my winnings for the day and should not play the lottery.

Question:

Who buys an iPhone from an airport vending machine? Seriously, I'd like to know. What kind of situation prompts that purchase? "oh, I'm bored, and I already read that Cosmo I brought. Better buy a $400 phone."

Now, lotto tickets in vending machines? There's something I can get behind. I thought Rhode Island was going to break my gambling streak... But no worries, I was easily able to purchase a losing scratch ticket before boarding my plane. GOD BLESS AMERICA.

Other fun facts of the day: copious antihistamines have enables me to elude the terrible fate of being trapped on a plane with hives. I even managed to have a comfortable first flight despite breaking several of my cardinal rules for traveling... I am wearing a SKIRT and FLIP FLOPS. I am typically too frightened of freezing my bum off for this kind of fashion statement. Look at me turning over those new leaves! Must be fall.

When it rains...

...it keeps raining.

Seriously, Colorado!? There are 344 days of sunshine in this state....why does it have to rain now!? If I'm going to get bad weather everywhere I go I hope that I will soon encounter spaghetti (a la Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs).

The theme of this trip is: I am now old. Between getting sick from the airplane, remembering to brush my hair, and attending a party where drunk, carefree co-eds made me feel more like a mom than a jealous teenager...I am now certain I have graduated to old status.

I always knew this day would come.

Now to go stock up on Sudaphed.

SNEAKY

I have devised a plan for tricking our Third and Most Silent Traveler into posting. We should probably pull an Old-Man-Search on her. Tell her that this page is how she submits travel reports, and that we have updated the form so that she is only required to report fun things like lotto winnings and ice cream discoveries.

FOOLPROOF.

Headed for the Homeland tomorrow. It is 106 degrees and on fire. In addition, I have chosen to spend my spare weekend in a hot, open field with 70,000 other people. I can't WAIT. Will report back on whether any performers have horrifying double nosebleeds on stage (ala Ben Kweller, 2006.)

Wish me luck.

Lottery Contest Update

Colorado: 1 dollar ticket. Lost.

Maybe there is a pre-requisite for sitting in miserable traffic in order to win big.

Also, I got upgraded to a sporty little fiat. No free satellite radio, though. No fair, I want my 90's on 9.

My friend is making me chicken dinner tonight so I guess that will suffice as a win. 

NOTES TO SELF

1. Do not leave your wallet home when driving to Connecticut for the day.

2. Always leave home with a full tank of gas, just in case you forget your wallet while driving to Connecticut for the day.

3. Always check under your front seat, just in case your wallet has actually been sitting there all along, and you are a complete idiot.

4. NEVER LEAVE YOUR CAR ALONE FOR 10 DAYS. It will probably feel hurt at your neglect, and possibly even decide to commit auto-cide in your absence.

VPaNnoying

Trying to use portal from the road is more annoying then waiting in traffic becuase all of Pennsylvania is flooding.

What happens if I rush a sorority while I'm on the road? Unprofessional?

Overly flirty car rental representative = no thanks.

Super little Fiat w/ a sunroof and free Sirius I ended up with as a result = YES PLEASE.

Best part: Mr. Business Man next to me who got the only other remaining compact car ....a sad, sad little Chevy that certainly wasn't equipped to blast the 90s on 9 all the way to Ann Arbor. SORRY, SIR. Forget the tie and shiny shoes - you too should have dressed in your finest flip flops and sweatpants to impress the rental agent.

Also, Ann Arbor.... you surprise me! Concerningly cute and hip. I do not trust you yet. Perhaps it is because I do not actually trust any college town with more students in it than there are residents in my home town. Too much party in one place. I'm pretty sure one of those frat houses can hold more people than I've lived with over the last three years.... and that's saying something.

Lotto update: no dice in Michigan. Illinois is still the reigning champ as Luckiest State. Good for you, Land of Lincoln. At least you've gotten something going for you.

..... PS, sorry, Illinois. I'm just kidding. We're cool. Missouri, you're ok too (mostly because of your delicious custard and comically large arch).

Travel Tip

Avoid questionable study abroad fair food. No matter how hungry you are that drippy meat sandwich will not be worth it.

It's raining and I'm sad becuase I only packed summer-fall transition outfits.

Benefits of having a delayed flight:

- Airport wifi.
-Time to read magazines at the newsstand.
- Upgraded car rental because they gave away my economy car an hour ago. Boo-yah.

It is the little things.

PPS

How many times do I have to change time zones in 48 hours before I am an Official Time Traveler?? I think I am close. My mind is boggled.

the one where Ashleigh gets rich.

I'M A WINNER!

Don't laugh. This is serious.

But wait, let's back up a second.

 Remember that time I decided to brave a 5 hour trip from St. Louis to Chicago to see a friend? And didn't consider that it was Labor Day weekend? AND IT TOOK 8 AND A HALF HOURS? After the first three hours (all spent IN Chicago), I didn't know whether I wanted to punch the car, the first person I saw, or my GPS for reminding me that I still had 300 miles to go. The WORST part? About an hour in, I realized I had left my snacks in the trunk.....

Once out of the city, traffic eventually disappeared. Just me, the corn, and a bunch of billboards telling me to find Jesus for the next 5 hours. I was still in rage mode, particularly when radio stations started to disappear and I realized I had brought my fully charged iPod all the way from home, but neglected to bring any sort of device to connect it to a car....

BUT THEN

I stopped in lovely Pontiac, Illinois to get gas. I went in to get a bottle of water and felt reckless.... so asked my friend Ellen behind the counter to give me her finest $1 scratch ticket. I sat in the car scratching away..... $5! and then... ANOTHER $10! ANOTHER $10! ANOTHER $5! OHMYGOSH, $15 MORE!!!

You guys, I won $45 on a $1 ticket! I ran back in to tell Ellen (who was very proud, she announced to the whole convenience store that her girl had just won lots o' money) who handed me a wad of cash. For a brief moment, I forgot everything I hated about Illinois! Forget the traffic! Forget the disgusting heat! Forget the endless corn! I WAS RICH!

I remembered EVERYTHING I hated about Illinois about an hour later, when I hit construction and traffic stopped DEAD. Whatever.

Against all odds, I eventually made it to the Show-Me State. My rage even disappeared (for the most part) after being greeted with a hug, box of cookies, and a cold beer from Kevin, who now wins the award for being my favorite person ever.

Next up: Friend Kevin will have to forcefully drag me back into a car so we can go to the Budweiser brewery (!), the Arch, and a whole host of other things I am told are free, awesome, and at least slightly ridiculous. Who would ever want to spend Labor Day on Cape Cod? This is clearly better than the beach! (?)

OK..... well, time for a breakfast cookie and a shower to prepare for my BIG FIRST DAY IN MISSOURI.  Don't worry, I plan to buy a lotto ticket before I leave.

Love,
RWP

PS... Why is Dr. Sulu on TV trying to tell me to learn more about social security?