And now for something completely different.

I just saw a lady changing her cat's diaper in an airport bathroom. What!?

Happy Friday, everyone.

Heart Breaker Dream Maker

I have now been to 3 fairs and visited 4 schools, and I made it safely South of the Mason-Dixon today for the beginning of my epic 3+ week trip.

Success on all fronts so far...expect in the love department. I thought y'all were slightly joking about breaking hearts doing this job. Nope, you were right, I was wrong. I've had to break 3 hearts in the past 24 hours. I feel like such a horrible person. 

1. A very tall ginger who is a rep for a Dublin study abroad program asked me out at a fair yesterday. He was sooooo Irish, I can't describe him any other way. While setting up our tables, he was super chatty and very intrigued by tall-ships (they are cool, I don't blame him). He then asked what I was doing after the fair (thank God EZ was driving back with me so I had a legit excuse) and if I wanted to go out with him afterwards. He apparently had 4 days before heading back to Dublin with nothing better to do. He even suggested I teach him how to sail for our first date. Yeah, no, sorry buddy. 

2. The kind, young, and yes, cute, Enterprise guy this evening at the airport actually fought the other girl working the counter to help me instead of the overweight jolly man behind me in line. We exchanged pleasantries about my travels and such while he rang me up and checked over the car. Then came the kicker..."So with all that travelling, you don't have a boyfriend, do you?" I can't lie to save my life, so I said no and laughed it off trying to just get in the car and leave as quickly as possible. As I pulled out of the parking lot he told me (read: yelled across the parking lot while waving frantically) what time he got off tonight in case I wanted to meet up later. Again, yeah no, sorry. 

3. I thought my hotel room key wasn't working when I went to move in my bags tonight, so I had to go back to the counter and wait forever for someone to come help me. A bell hop with a lazy eye lept to my aid, escorting me back to my room, only to find out that I was just too weak to push the handle down enough to open the door. Fail. He then proceeded to ask me out. Double fail. 

Those are my sob stories for now. I'm sure it will only get more interesting from here on out...

the one where I wander around a fancy hotel with no shoes on.

HOW TO HAVE A SUPER FUN MONDAY NIGHT.

Be wiped and just about ready to go to sleep.

Have some trash that includes food, decide it might be better off in a trashcan not in your room. Grab a key and walk down the hall to dispose of it. Return to your room, but only get a flashing red angry light from your door. Hm.

Assume you demagnetized the key. Go downstairs into the marble-floored, 4-star lobby wearing  your finest sweatpants, stained tshirt, and no shoes (classy!). Get a new key, and an escort back to the room (since you didn't have an ID to show.) New key won't work either. Have your escort call someone else to bring a magical little machine to reprogram the lock. Works, but still flashes a slightly less angry yellow light. 

Call Engineering to replace your lock battery. Have Engineering tell you that they brought the wrong type of battery, wait 20 more minutes for the right kind. Sit in your room awkwardly while Engineering fiddles with lock.

Finally have a securely locked room with functioning key. 

Go to sleep, fingers crossed that you don't have to do it all again tomorrow......

Day 1

First fair of the season. So many Vera Bradley backpacks.

Also, just a gentle reminder from my body to yours that not all fair food is good food.

I take back anything I said about loving college.

I wish it were acceptable to politely decline an offer to speak to an 8am class. So early. So so early.

I have seen sunrise every day this week. Is there some sort of early riser award for this??

WELCOME TO A LIVE LOTTO BROADCAST!

Yes dear readers, that's right. I'm going to scratch my first lotto ticket of travel season. RIGHT NOW. While I type this. Let's go.... (set the scene: since I missed actual Bingo last night, I bought the State of Michigan's finest bingo scratch off!!)

All I need is an O67......

Wah wah. Sorry friends... turns out scratch ticket bingo is as overcomplicated and unrewarding as actual bingo. No dice in Michigan.

ANYWAY.

Is this really only my third day of travel? Not the third week? Too much to process has happened already. After a brief detour to see the prosthetic leg of Santa Anna (as any good Texan would and should), I made it to Indiana and the site of my first fall fair. Hopefully this event was not an indicator of things to come. If it was, I should probably be prepared to spend half of the fall season soaking wet, holding down a tent that is trying to blow away (as well as my skirt, which was trying to do the same), and silently praying for lightning so that I can go inside. This means the second half of fall would then be moderately sunny, full of mosquitoes, and would involve a lunch of pretzels and powerade.

BUT I DIGRESS.  I have now left the Hoosier state at a comfortable distance, and have two days to cruise around Michigan in a shiny Fiat with an air conditioner that blows hot air directly on my face. Good thing it's 90 degrees out!

....Yes, I would like some cheese with that whine. IN OTHER NEWS, pros of this week: airports I always forget are surprisingly nice (shout out to Detroit and Indianapolis), a free beer at my hotel upon check-in last night (seriously, Best Western Plus is the new love of my life), a drive through the Watermelon Capital of the Midwest (no time to stop, unfortunately), and a visit to the one and only Abraham Lincoln Presidential Museum and Library. This last one is a bit indescribable, but should you ever find yourself in Springfield.... GET OUT. Quickly. But first take a stop at the museum. Worth it!

Signing off from the only part of the country in which video stores still exist,

Road Warrior Princess.

Round four.

Ends in floor right? Okay, then here we go...

As I should expect by now each new travel season brings new challenges and surprises. Today must be lucky because I have already seen plenty.

First, I saw death flash before my eyes when a semi almost collided with my bus to the airport. One lady screamed. But out expert driver swerved away. Safe.

Second, a new twist on an old story. A TSA employee hit on me while going through security. I felt so awkward about his compliments of my "beautiful eyes matching my blue scarf" and his pleas to "take (him) with (me)" that I couldn't even pack up my bag there and had to run off with my computer and liquids in hand. Luckily the new bean bags are ready to roll and I made a quick escape.

Third, a note for next time. No longer do terminal e fliers need to pack heavy snacks. There is now a burrito place in the southwest terminal. No more donuts and corn nuts for lunch! Rejoice!

More to follow once I've hit the friendly skies. Happy travels, everyone!